Last week, I was asked by my best friend to be a bridesmaid for her wedding next August. Naturally, I was excited and honored...so, of course, I said yes!
Then...
She asked me if I could do her wedding invitations. (Well, more like, she "told" me. Ha ha.)
Now, mind you, card crafting is more of a hobby to me. I've never really tried to venture out into selling my cards. Aside from the one-off occasion during Christmas where people actually wanted to buy my cards...and I couldn't say no to making an extra dolla on the side. :) But other than that, it's merely a casual hobby.
But nevertheless, I would do anything for my girl, so, I am definitely up for the challenge! She sent me some websites and links to the types of styles she was interested in. And instantly, I got inspired. These are just some derived sketches based on the images she sent me.
And the following night, I made these mock invites. Obviously, not the finished product, since there's still talk of different themes/colours and such, but you'll get the idea.
Very simple, and streamlined...which makes for an easy template to work with.
Surprisingly, these weren't too difficult to make. And I actually enjoyed making them; getting back into my card crafting mentality. However, I'm bracing myself now when I find out how many invites I will need to make in the not-too-distant future! Lord help me...lol!
Why Is It
Why is it
That when we are faced with
The sudden disconnection
Disruption and discontinuity
From someone regarded
With such loving esteem
Who is magnificent and significant
That penetrates to the very core of your being
That only then we belatedly see
The gravity of their personality
The uniqueness of their complexity
The rarity of their identity
The deepness of their company
But in hindsight
And cruel unforgiving honesty
I should have seen this coming
So I’ve tried to prepare my mind
Lessen my pride
And soothe my bruised identity
By recognizing the signs
To next time seize moments that
May have otherwise seemed fleeting
Because somehow
Our intentions were
Unintentionally miscommunicated
I should have patiently waited
Chilled out
Subsided and listened to your call
And cool calm cadence
I should have been respondent
To our realities
Instead of feeding into
Unrealistic fantasies
That somehow got to the best of our senses
I should not have questioned
What it meant to be in your presence
While you should not have tested
The worth within my essence
So fair enough, I can’t lie
We share a fair amount of grievance
I should not have
Wasted time
Analyzing and furiously desensitizing
An isolated incidence
Because in the absence of your presence
I’m now forced to ignore predominant traces
Of your prevalence
You ran so frequent though many an instance
And influenced deep sentiments
And longful pretenses
I’m now faced with relegating you as an acquaintance
And have struggled to find subsistence
To an otherwise inherent and intrinsic existence
I should have relished more
In our concrete experience
Because all I’m searching for
Is cognizance towards perseverance
See
I could have gone back to the very beginning
I could find reasons for our randomly pleasant
And one-off chance meeting
And dissect each and every word
Every sentence
Action and reaction
With a fine toothed comb
But I’m slowly learning to not enter into that mode
I should not query on what is already truly gold
But simultaneously
Concerning you
I should not speculate and claim to know
What I do not control
What I should continue to do
Is recognize and own
The part in which I had to play in this role
However
Wishfully thinking…
If ever we come across another moment
Between us both
Know that we should take it for what it truly is
And what it’s here for
We should not deny our need for companionship
And not let it take over
And impede our self-growth
We should take what we instinctually
And intimately know
About us and each other
And raise it
Appreciate it
Watch it
Sit upon that throne
So that we won’t ever forget
How dangerously close
We were to losing it
Because unfortunately
Not many people come across
Moments like those
The rare chance to grasp it
Atone for it and transpose
Ironically
I yearn for it
I aspire to capture it
If ever that moment arose
But for the time being
Naturally
I at least have the chance to express it
Through my therapeutic
And poetic prose
It’s my only answer and comfort
To the question originally posed
Why is it
-j.sanjuan
-Submission for Open Link Night, DVerse Poets Pub. Link, Enjoy, Share!
On the time of year during her passing (it's been 10 years already!)...here is another classic Aaliyah song...enjoy!
...I joined Twitter!......lol.
It took a while for the convincing to kick in (most especially from my sis-in law). :D But, I bit the bullet! And I've finally arrived!
My main motivation to open up a Twitter account was to start getting more involved with the local poetry community in Vancouver. For those of you who already know, poetry/writing is my first love. And I've been really wanting to push my boundaries in attempts to find different inspiration and creativity for my poems.
So voila! I thought this would be the quickest and simplest way to do so. And I have to admit, I'm looking forward to seeing what kind of energy I can draw from this, as well, getting excited as to what wonderful poets and artists are out there!
So come and find me: @j_poetry
I'm still in the skeleton stages of set-up...so bear with me while I slowly start making it pretty like this here beloved blog of mine. LOL
Looking forward to this new step in self-discovery.
Sure, I have my fears.
It can hinder my progress.
Or drive me to face it and conquer it.
Either way, I have to acknowledge it's there.
It exists.
There are some fears:
-I still struggle with.
-I've allowed to dictate my actions.
-I've let take over and cloud my judgement.
(This can stem from a lot of things. Everything from wanting to be accepted to not wanting to be alone, and all things in between)
-I've found are profoundly personal.
-I've also found are genuinely universal.
-I choose not to face (for whatever reason--the "I'm not ready" excuse).
-I've conquered (not without much adversity and hardship).
Being fearless is a constant work in progress.
A constant examination of self, conscience, character, individuality, identity.
Being fearless might be desirable to some.
However, for me, not having enough fear can impede inspiration.
I'm still trying to figure out and find this fine balance.
"Fear only has as much power as we give it space."
- Josh Ritter
Every now and then, I know that for myself, I tend to look back at my life and wonder certain things. How did I get to a certain situation or circumstance (albeit professionally and/or personally), what kind of conscious decisions have I made that directly affect my position in life, and what kind of people I surround and associate myself that help create an intended outcome (simply to aid or complement the way I want to have myself be put out there).
Mind you, sometimes these situations/decisions/personalities can be a source of minor frustration. However, the vast majority of these instances where I tend to look back at things, I am just merely being thankful. Being thankful that regardless of it having a negative or positive impact on me, there certainly is a reason behind the things, places and people we have in our life. Our only goal in life is to simply recognize and appreciate them to the greatest most possible degree.
All of the above came to mind when I read this quote.
"When we honestly ask which persons in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. "
-Henri J.M. Nouwen
